ASSERTIVENESS

Saturday, August 21, 2010 - si tukang karang : zey at 8:09 AM
assalamualaikum~


aq teringat, masa kelas english aritu,
walaupun, aq mmg xsuka kelas english ni, yang syllabus nya cam budak baru masuk sekolah menengah...tp aq still dtg, sebab madam tu best.
n member2 aq pon x ponteng~ xkan aq nak ponteng sorg? aq rugi. watpe??
aritu, tetiba je dia ada kata kat ktorg pasal sikap ASSERTIVENESS.
assertiveness in Malay they call sifat yang menegaskan.


klik utk pembesaran
put a full stop at a conversation or even a relationship!

why be assertive??? 
ceh. cakap omputih la plak kan.. xde..aq cuma nak ingat balik ayat madam aq tu.
kita kena jadi tegas! kenapa?
becoz being assertive is the way to express our confidence, importance or power..n the most important thing is: earn respect from others.

camane nak jadi tegas??
assertiveness is standing up for your right to be treated fairly.
layan semua org sama rata seperti manusia.
jadi tegas! put a full stop. 
people say that the best discussion always end with a conclusion.
apa salahnya kalau kita yang konklusikan?
jadi tegas! and yes, we gain respect!
stop bagi green light kat org lain.
sedangkan kita, masih cam dulu, xgerak2....


berani cakap TIDAK!

because people want to be liked and thought of as 'nice' or 'easy to get along with' , they often keep their opinions to themselves, wut for??? especially if those opinions conflict with other people's. but this sometimes leads to being taken advantage of by people who are not as nice or considerate. Asserting yourself will stop others from cheating you and you from cheating yourself out of what you deserve.
start being assertive peeps!

selalunya, dalam masyarakat kita, sifat tegas tu, sikap yang xberapa disenangi.
cikgu yang tegas, student menyampah. jadi ayah yang tegas, anak2 wat kerja membelakangi family. jadi bos yang tegas, pekerja cakap buruk belakang bos.
xsalah sebenarnya utk jadi tegas.
jadi tegas, dalam masa yang sama still being open-minded thinking.
dengar opinion org lain, tp xsemestinya terima opinion mereka.
aq rasa ibubapa zaman sekarang wajib ajar anak2 diorang utk jadi tegas.
baru ada confident. baru ada respect.
jadi tegas utk menegakkan opinion kita [so that people x kondem kita abes-abesan] tp xmenjatuhkan org lain, xkecilkan hati org lain....~
jadi tegas tanpa melukakan hati org lain. 
berani utk reject other's request if they are too demanding.
sorry too say that if we are being so damn nice, other people will take advantage to us. so, stop being so0o0 nice....~


why on earth you can't say NO???

aq khususkan sifat tegas ni dalam satu hubungan. lover relationship.
dalam bulan ramadan ni saja, da berapa banyak kes buang bayi?? buang janin?
da cam kembali ke zaman jahilliah je aq tgk.
ada gak family yang sanggup bersubahat dengan kes2 camni. Masya Allah~
korg percaya atau x, tu semua sebab xde sifat tegas.
terlalu sayang + xperlu tegas = silap besar!
aq xterlintas langsung nak cakap pasal kaum. 
semua org ada kaum, agama....or at least kepercayaan.
sebenarnya, org yang mengandungkan anak luar, Allah tutup aib dia,
perut dia xlah membesar cam anak halal. tgk, Allah still jaga aib mereka.
kadang2 ada remaja sekarang yang xtaw pon yang dia pregnant...
tup..tup...g toilet..deliver~~ 
semua orang pernah wat silap, jadikan ianya pengajaran, bukan landasan ke  tempat yang lebih teruk.
semua org berhak jadi baik.


be assertive!


usha sikit ASSERTIVE BEHAVIOR ni:


1. starting, changing, or ending conversation
bila kita rasa relationship kita ni suatu kesilapan. try to change it.
change for better, n if dia xley terima gak the-new-me, put a full stop la!
ada bran?? yer, aq taw.. bukan senang nak putuskan satu relationship tu.


2. sharing feelings, opinions, and experiences with others
cuba cerita kat dia pasal pengalaman org2 sekeliling, kalau xpon cerita la kat dia pasal kes2 kat surat khabar tu. 
gtaw pasal opinion korg gak, gtaw yang korg xsuka bila camni..camtu...~
girls, jgn start bagi beb!
barula dia respect korg...baru boley jadi bini. [cewah!] bakal mak mentua korg pon boley tabik spring toink-toink kat korg! haha!
tp, jgn cakap rabak...pastu xwat yer!


3. making requests and asking for favors
watlah request... bkn request lagu daa...~
bila dia da start cakap yang bukan2....sampai ke bulan...sampai dasar laut...
tp, jgnlah kondem dia..jgn sampai dia malu.dia pon nak trick kita tu,
tgk kita mudah ke x...
ckpla camni "would u mind changing the topic? i'm not comfortable wit it"
eh, ni contoh madam aq kasi.
realitinya: xbestla u...cerita camni, i rasa, baik kita cerita pasal ikan swim2 ke..pasal plankton ke....~ ceyt, mariners berchenta camni ke???


4. refusing others' requests if they are too demanding
lah, dia gak nak wat request...
haa...request dia ni kena jaga2..... rasa2 cam lebih je, kasi dia buku lima! 
selalunya lelaki, dia wat request dulu.... dia tanya dulu
ayat susun chantek, kasi bunga2 wat girls cair....cair iman....~
jadi assertive! 
reject request dia yang bukan2 tu.....n kalau dia xde respect kat korg,
cari lain la der....!


5. questioning rules that don't make sense or don't seem fair
dia baru jadi balak kaw, bukan husband kaw... [officially husband i mean]
xkanla 24/7 nak ikut cakap dia je.
cakap kaw sape nak dengar??? tegasla sikit,
kalau xreti sgt jadi tegas....girls, cuba try merajuk...
eleh, pompuan pandai kan bab2 merajuk ni....
ngn member pompuan madah merajuk jer!
eh, ape plak aq???dah..dah~~


6. addressing problems or things that bother you
kalau korg rasa apa yang dia wat tu, annoying gila, cakapla kat dia...
tp ingat...jgn sampai dia terasa..kecik kaki, kecik hati..kan payah.
"u taw x...i ada masalah la bila u suka dekat2 kat i ni.. i tawla u sayang i...tp xyahlah dekat2...i pon sayang sgt kat u taw x....sayang sgt2...bila u dekat2..meleset2 kat i....i rasa gatal la.."
haha! sudah...ade kudis ke??? =pp


7. being firm so that your rights are respected
ni bukan firma guaman yer. jadi firm. kukuh ngn opinion kita.
once i said no...it means forever!!! 
dah sekali cakap xnk tu, xnklah.....belajar je tinggi2 tp perangai setaraf ngn budak2 bawah jambatan...pe cer mat??? eh, tetiba emo plak~

ni lahh...7 perangai assertive yang korang patut ada
sebenarnya ada byk madam aq kata...tp malas aq nk salin yang lain2 tu.
cukupla 7 utk korg n utk aq gak...~






















bila aq teringat balik, aq pernah jadi assertive dalam perhubungan aq dulu. aq put a full stop... aq berani letak konklusi kat hubungan aq dulu. aq berani sebab teori aq if u luv somebody so much....try to leave him/her free... if he/she coming back...then, it's yours...u're mean for each other.
n the result is: he's not coming back. n the conclusion is: we're not mean for each other. haha! the simple me, speak out!!



apa u'all rasa? 

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